Here Lay the Struggle of my Inner man...
First, twice born, once into natural states,
and then again a spiritual man, but not mature yet an embryo!
I walk between the promise of light,
and the transcendent darkness, which plagues my kind, to bondage and decay.
Yet there I am in this perpetual struggle, if it eases for a moment it never eases,
If it ceases it never ceases!
I have victory, but have not drunk it up,
I have freedom, but have not yet obtained it!

I am engaged in a battlefield beyond flesh, beyond strength and weakness, beyond my own capabilities to endure, or even suffer defeat!
I am here to overcome, yet it is not in my overcoming, but in the overcoming of another,
My Savior, the world’s savior, in whom I am truly justified!
Yet I am still inflamed with equal and opposite passions!
Hear it now.
In one lies the quest for power, for dominance, for sexual arrival, for lust, for vanity, for the fulfilment of me! And yet the other, growing stronger still only by the very blood drop of Grace, lies my quest to submit, to surrender my sensualities, and to just utterly die!

Will I ever be able to trod this narrow highway, through the one gate, to the place of my Father’s rest? Or is it even to do with my own capabilities? I submit that no man can enter by his own merit, and what merit were I to have even if I had merit, but the wager of death and lies on my lips?
Oh Pilgrim see to it that you find this world as nothing! Not a place to rest your head, lest you die here and become complacent, satisfied with the broad road to the Gates of destruction! Oh Lord Hear my plea! Let me be a man who walks this Holy highway, and walks it by the faith hope and love you have bequeathed to this lowly and Afflicted heart. Be Blessed YWEY, father of Fathers, God of God’s. Keep me in thy sight, lest I be taken in by the deceptions of my inner man!
Save The church from all her troubles!